monologue
- beginning too emotive; consider not so much emotion to start with so that it an be more powerful.
- where are you and what are you doing?
- consider not playing it childlike; maybe you are grown up women; it might be more effective. or having just few moments of return to childhood.
- effective interaction but a little unsteady movement; needs some stillness and specific movement rather than shuffling
- dad or dan?
- the hand movement a little cliche? maybe a more naturalistic holding hand and walking off. potential for real moment there.
- samanth a more dispassionate confession might be more effective
- again, more switching from description as adults to mum... don't..
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